Hey look at that my heart grew

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Hey look at that my heart grew

Growing our third kiddo made me think back on my pregnancy with Odin (baby no.2) and how terrified I was about going from one kiddo to two. I feared that I love Seth so much (baby no.1) and maybe I just couldn’t love baby no.2 as much or maybe I would suck at showing them both equal lovey dovey emotions. I look back now and laugh because it was seriously a huge fear of mine! I wanted so badly to love both my kids equally. I thought, when Seth was born it was the best day of my life, this little amazing miracle that was my everything how on earth can I bonk him down a notch to share myself with another baby. Will I feel the same with my second baby, how can someone love two little amazing beings the same amount?! Was it possible?

Would I suck as a mom of two?

Was it way different?

Would I be as emotional with my second baby as I was with my first on the day I pushed him out?

These fears literally sat in the back of my mind with everything I did with Seth as my belly grew and then the day of Odin’s birth came and I was calm and cuddling with Seth. I was uncomfortable but had the whole day just being with Seth and I honestly think he got me through the early stages of labor easily because I thought I was seriously just uncomfortable when I finally went in to be checked out to be safe.

My labor was pretty quick and I lost track of all those fears and jumped into I gotta get this kiddo out and make sure they don’t make me do anything I don’t want mode. As soon as he came out as soon as I saw him I fell in love, I was amazed and I understood how every mother of multiple children says your heart just grows and you are able to love so much more with every child. I love my boys with every piece of my heart and I don’t fear any of that with my third pregnancy. As a matter of fact I have yet to even think about anything like that.

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Seth is literally the best brother in the world, an amazing helper, fell in love with Odin the day he saw him and often comes to hug my belly and talk to Baby A (baby no.3 name yet to be released) because he says soon he will have a new baby and he can’t wait! Odin will have a play mate because they’re pretty close in age and the whole new baby scared feeling pretty much hasn’t hit at all lol. Soon I’ll find out what life with three is like but I am more than overjoyed that we will soon be parents to three amazing kiddos! We have yet to find out if this is a boy or a girl, and honestly I’m not too worried about which sex it will be. If we get another boy yay we have a little group of crazy boys and everywhere we go they’ll say wow 3 boys?! If we have a girl then yay we got our girl! I’m not sure exactly how many kiddos we want but I do know I want a bit of a rest after this pregnancy to find out if we want more or not.

If there’s anyone out there with these fears… I assure you your heart does grow <3

Posted in: Daily life

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